


The Carter Solution

by kirinsaga



Category: Hogan's Heroes
Genre: Crossover, Gen, Happy!Klink, Prankster!Carter, a bored Carter is a fun Carter, guess the crossover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-27
Updated: 2014-05-27
Packaged: 2018-01-26 20:15:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1701131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kirinsaga/pseuds/kirinsaga
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hogan asked Carter to make a hair growing pack for Klink. Because reasons...</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Carter Solution

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know why I thought of this crossover. I haven't seen the movie since I was a kid. In the 1980s.

Title: Untitled until I think of something  
Author: kirinsaga  
Disclaimer: Of course, I don't own these characters.

 

The prisoners all stared, still in shock, as the ecstatic Kommandant practically skipped back to his office, his newly grown hair glistening in the morning light. Almost as one, the men of Barracks 2 turned to stare at Carter.

 

Carter looked around in confusion. "Why is everyone staring at me?"

 

Hogan opened and closed his mouth a few times before he finally found his voice. "What was that stuff you made for him?"

 

Carter was sure to keep a confused expression on his face, though mentally he was cackling with glee. "A hair growing pack, like you told me to." He put on a worried expression. "Did I screw up again?"

 

Everyone continued to stare, and Carter feigned nervousness until someone finally managed to find their voice. "I don't suppose you have any of that hair growing pack left?"

 

Carter frowned in thought as the men all pretended they weren't so interested in the answer. Even Hogan was paying close attention (he had a full head of shiny hair but what if one day...). "I gave Klink all I had. Sorry, fellas."

 

Grown men did not pout; they frowned in disappointment. And Carter noticed that every single one of them was not-pouting. This just kept getting funnier. He'd bet ten dollars that Hogan was about to order him to make more, if Newkirk wasn't still staring in shock after Klink (Carter hoped someone smacked him upside the head soon. He looked stuck).

 

"Why don't you make some more, Carter?"

 

Carter should have smacked Newkirk himself, then split his winnings as an apology. If they could have gotten anyone to take the bet, which was unlikely. He frowned in mild disappointment (which was definitely not pouting because the disappointment was mild), which made him look like apologetic. Which he was, a bit. "Well, I would, Colonel, but I'm out of peanut butter."

 

Carter really wished he had a camera with him. No one would ever believe Hogan could look so confused. It would have made excellent blackmail.

 

Plus, he could have used the camera to smack Newkirk.

 


End file.
